Coffee Quotes

The best, funniest and most clever quotes about coffee are…

Coffee Quotes

Humanity runs on coffee



Coffee is a language in itself.

Jackie Chan


Coffee is a kind of magic you can drink…

Catherynne M. Valente


I never laugh until I’ve had my coffee.

Clark Gable


Love is in the air, and it smells like coffee.



Coffee is a beverage that puts one to sleep when not drank.

– Alphonse Allais


I have measured out my life with coffee spoons.

– T.S. Eliot


I want someone to look at me the way I look at coffee.



I judge a restaurant by the bread and by the coffee.

Burt Lancaster


But even a bad cup of coffee is better than no coffee at all.

David Lynch

He quit drinking coffee, and naturally, his brain stopped working.

Orhan Pamuk


The fresh smell of coffee soon wafted through the apartment, the smell that separates night from day.

Haruki Murakami


Black as the devil, hot as hell, pure as an angel, sweet as love.

Charles Maurice de Talleyrand


No matter what historians claimed, BC really stood for ‘Before Coffee.’

Cherise Sinclair


Without my morning coffee, I’m just like a dried-up piece of goat.

J.S. Bach


I never drink coffee at lunch. I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon.

 Ronald Regan


As long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?

Cassandra Clare


A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems

 Alfred Renyi

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I would rather suffer with coffee than be senseless.

Napoleon Bonaparte


Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee.

Stephanie Piro


To make me happy: Make me coffee, bring me coffee, be coffee …coffee.



If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee

 Abraham Lincoln


The powers of a man’s mind are directly proportional to the quantity of coffee he drinks.

Sir James MacKintosh


He was my cream, and I was his coffee – And when you poured us together, it was something

 Josephine Baker


Way too much coffee. But if it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever

 David Letterman


Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his coffee before it was cool Coffee Jokes

Barista Life


I believe humans get a lot done, not because we’re smart, but because we have thumbs so we can make coffee.

Flash Rosenberg


Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?

 Jean Kerr


 I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, ’Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.’

Jim Carrey


Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.Good communication is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after

 Anne Morrow Lindbergh

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